The Life We’ve Lived (a paean to friendship)

Caro and I sat down tonight and couldn’t think of anything to write about. So instead, we talked. I’ve come home, and all I can think about is how blessed we’ve been. We talked a little about ourselves at twenty, and how we weren’t where we thought we’d be – but then neither of us could really remember where we thought we’d be by now!

We talked about the amazing things we’ve done in our lives – no Nobel prize-winning or cancer curing for us – but the small, simple, beautiful, anguished things. The men we’ve loved; the friends we’ve had and lost – or had and held onto. How since that first meeting (which Caro doesn’t remember but I clearly do!) we’ve known, no matter what, that we could rely on each other and trust each other. Our lives have circled around and there have been many times when we haven’t seen each other for months, but we’ve always known the other was there.

As I was driving home, I was thinking back over the years and the milestones – those big


and little things that have happened in my adult life. There are very few in which Caro did not play a part. High class dinner parties when we were still quite young; the suicide of a friend; a foray into Theatresports; fitness classes (we were just an inch shy of being fanatics*); relationship breakups; overseas travel; marriages; babies; second marriages; funerals; more babies; career successes and failures; three novels; countless birthdays and Christmases. We know each other’s families and each other’s histories. We don’t have to explain. Our emotional shorthand is clear to both of us.

We don’t always agree. We wouldn’t always make the same choices. Our tastes are significantly different. But we are linked. Joined at an elemental level. A bond forged through shared experiences mutual respect and above all, constancy.

I’m not a renowned author; a visionary; a world leader. But I am a lover, mother, writer who has seen so much societal and technological change in my life. And always, always, I have been blessed with amazing friends. Caro is one of them. I wouldn’t trade these friendships for all the tea in China. Cheers Caro, here’s to many more years!

* Caro sez: LOL think we might have tipped just slightly over the edge into all out fanaticism on the odd occasion ;-P Love you heaps xxx